Posted by James Altucher
As Yoda says, “Try not. Do!”
Here’s what you can do:
A) Take a pad of 100 sheets. Write a note to her on each sheet of why you love her or a receipt for something she can do to you in the future. Let your imagination run wild. Hide each sheet in something she will eventually find (kitchen cabinets, books she likes, pockets of coats she’ll wear next winter. She won’t find all 100 sheets today but eventually she will and each time she will be grateful to you for putting the thought in.
B) Make dinner for her. Look up recipes. Go shopping. Make it a great dinner.
C) Take one negative thought you have about her. Study it. Why is it that you don’t like that about her? What from her past or your past could be causing that dislike. Really dive in. Try to understand what is happening. Heck, try this with two negative thoughts you have about her.
D) Clean yourself. Shave. Brush your teeth twice. Shower. Dress in a nice suit. Comb your hair. Taking care of yourself is the best way of loving her.
E) Oh, what the hell: let’s take another negative thought about her. Why judge so much? Are you overly judgemental? Can’t you just let her be the woman you fell in love with?
F) Surprise her. How? I don’t know. It’s a suprise. Hmmm, let’s brainstorm: Buy her a dress that fits her just right. Call her mother and ask her how she’s doing. Ask her about her day, about the people she encountered. Whatever she says, ask her to “clarify” (I put that in quotes because Claudia always announces to me, “now it’s time for you to ask me to clarify things.”) Plan a staycation for the two of you (see above).
G) Find one thing new about her that you didn’t know before. Put it down in a notebook. One new thing a day. Then you’ll have a book of new things about her. You can make a drawing for each one. Give her the book on your anniversary.
These seem like kitchy things. But if you do them, it’s not that you will love her more, it’s that she’ll appreciate you more. And then you’ll see sides of her you maybe didn’t recognize before.